I hold on to a lot of fear. I have no idea why I do this. I just know that it holds me back.
Over the past few weeks I have been working on my handstand. Whilst doing that, I have realised all the fear I have around inversions and going upside down. When I am in handstand I am terrified that I will fall forward or my arms will buckle beneath me. The fear is in my head and not real, but it manifests in the present and I come out of handstand pretty quickly.
So in order to improve my handstand and actually hold it I have had to do a lot of mental work as well as physical. At first this was a surprise to me. I assumed I struggled in handstand because of my arm strength and core muscles. Not because of my thoughts. But reflecting on this it makes perfect sense. In most of the situations in life we have full capacity already to achieve whatever we want, however it is our mind that invents these walls and barriers around us and holds us back.
I have been breaking down these walls. Releasing my fears. Setting them free. I have done this by bringing my fears to the surface, really looking at them practically and asking questions. Why do I have these fears? Are they helping me? Are they real? When I ask those questions I see my fears with a new perspective. I am able to feel them and realise the truth of them, and that way I set them free.
After weeks of this process. Releasing my fears again and again. I saw the first real glimpse of the effect this can have. I tried a handstand against a wall for the first time ever. Usually I would let my brain take over and I would think I wouldn’t be able to do it, that I am not strong enough, that it is for the advanced people out there. But this time I didn’t think. I had music on and I was focusing on my breath. I was too in the zone to have any thoughts enter my head. So I went straight into it. Easy. I stayed there for as long as I wanted too and then came down with control. It was amazing.
This may not seem very exciting for some people but for me it was a big achievement. Holding a handstand for as long as I wanted (even against a wall) was such a big breakthrough for me and I now know I can do anything.
We all hold onto our fears for one reason or another. I know it is sometimes hard or painful to truly let them go. But trust me it is worth it. We don’t know what we are capable of achieving until we actually release our fears and just GO FOR IT. What is the worst that could happen? You fall? Then try again. You fail? Then try again. There is only you to judge yourself, no one else. So if you stop judging then maybe the fear will dissipate and all that is left it opportunity and freedom.
Repeat with me ‘I release my fears’.
I release my fears.
I release my fears.
I can achieve anything.